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Good afternoon. I decided to get on here and share some of my thoughts on Racism and how to overcome it. I’ll also share a little bit of my journey over the last couple months. Our country has taken a big turn and it ‘ll be interesting to see where we come out on the other side. I have a lot of thoughts so please stick with me.


Over the past few months what’s going on in our country has push me into the deep end of my history. What I’ve learned has shaken me to the core, pushed me to the edge, enraged me, made my brain hurt, crushed my heart, sent me to sleep in tears, and brought me to a deeper appreciation for the truth.

Now that I’ve come to a healthy place in my process, I’m ready to share my journey, what I believe can help and make myself available moving forward. The conversation needs to be started, but more importantly we need to continue the conversation after the emotion has worn off.

This first part is going to be hard to hear but please stick with me, truth doesn’t always feel good but it’s always worth it. Challenging our beliefs is essential because our beliefs aren’t always what’s right.


I want to start by saying…

I’ve been ignorant, please forgive me.

These are some things that I’ve learned about Black history and I want to share those.


What I’ve learned…

  • That Black people have been on American soil for as long as White people have.
  • Black people have zero generational wealth.
  • Home ownership and land is the driving force behind wealth and generational wealth. Owning land and home allows you to draw on your own equity rather than debt from banks. Creating self-sufficiency.
  • While Black freeman were paying every penny to any land, they could never being able to make it profitable their White peers were being leased land for next to nothing building generational wealth.
  • Black people created and ran an amazing business community called Black Wall Street that was purposely destroyed by White people, leaving them with nothing again.
  • After slavery was over it morphed into slavery under a different named. Sharecropping, used to keep Black people in debt to White people and tied to the land they worked never having the opportunity to own and profit off their own land.
  • Abraham Lincoln wrote and passed a bill that would give every freed male slave 4 acers of land and a mule to get started in becoming self-sufficient only to have it disregarded and over run by FDRs ……… leaving Black people once again with nothing.
  • Native Americans, Asians, and Jews directly affected by the atrocities that took place at the hand of the White population and their descendants are receiving payment for what happen to them on American soil. Blacks have still received nothing and it keeps being rejected in 2020.
  • The conservative Republican party rejected and dismantled the Freedmen’s Bureau created by Lincoln.
  • Between 1934-1968 Black people were refused home loans while their White peers were given home loans in high value areas. Banks used a Red Line chart to determine where home loans would be given or not. Green areas we’re high value White and Red were low value Black property. Walls and fences were erected forming the projects.
  • In 1968 when the Fair Housing Act (FHA) was put in play none of the property values were recalculated leaving the Redline chart essentially the same as before which still affects us in 2020.
  • Schools are more segregated today than they were during Jim Crow because of Red Lining. Since Black people weren’t given home loans in Green areas (White neighborhoods) they also couldn’t send their children to White school.
  • Black people have notoriously bad schools because of Red Lining. Schools are funded by property tax. Since Red areas had low property value their schools reflected less funding whereas Green areas have high property values funding schools with way more money for supplies, equipment, resources, curriculum, and teachers. This still affects us in 2020.
  • Black and White people used drugs at roughly the same rate, however the main areas for the fight against drugs was concentrated in Red Lined areas meaning a much higher percentage of Black people went to jail while Whites remained free.
  • Welfare was originally created with the requirement that women could receive as long as the Father wasn’t in the house, breaking the family unit sending men to the streets. 
  • Compton wasn’t always a relentless ghetto. It started a middle-class suburb. In 1948 when the 14th amendment finally made it illegal to restrict Black people from occupying property they had the finances to buy homes in Compton. White people terrorized them throughout the 40s and 50s followed by quickly moving because of threats of lower property value.
  • Many of the lifesaving and gynecological procedures we are used to were at the involuntary sacrifice of experiments on Black slave women. Many procedures left Black women sterile, maimed, or dead.
  • At every turn White leaders created systems to hinder Black people from being self-sufficient and creating generational wealth for their families. They used and abused the Black population for their own gain.
  • Black people are 400 years behind their White peers although we are free to actually build businesses through entrepreneurship now.
  • The constitution wasn’t created with Black people included; in fact, we didn’t even count as a whole person we were three fifths.

– Now a lot of times the thing that is recited is not the Constitution it’s the Declaration of Independence and in that it says…

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal,… this didn’t pertain to the Black population …that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,… This didn’t pertain to the Black population so this created a problem. …However, it goes on to say. –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to affect their Safety and Happiness.

We see this happening in the 13th, 14th, and 15th Amendment, laws were changed, and equality was created.

  • Finally, I understand White privilege.

-In this way, my husband and I seek to create a path of success for our children, if when they grow up, they have peers whose parents didn’t set them up, our children would be seen as privileged. This happen on a mass scale.


Where I find myself now…

Needless to say, my heart has been heavy. I’ve sought wise counsel from elders, family, and friends.

What I realized is although I look at a Black face every day and don’t consider myself sheltered; my reality was being raised in a White culture which has led me to speak overly caviler about Black history. Although I have White privilege because my mom is White, I grew up in white neighborhoods, went to white schools and have a white mindset I still couldn’t escape from Black experiences. I thought I knew but what I was missing was the deep understanding of the pain, and agony of the past that I see now, is still woven into our everyday lives.

I’ve been racially profiled, thrown in jail because I was Black, been called racist names I won’t repeat here, been raped, and dealt with police brutality, I’ve had a phone call with a White person only to meet them in person with and see their facial expression of disappointment. I’ve been told my hair wasn’t appropriate for my workplace, I’ve been near poisoned with food at a restaurant because I’m black. I thought I knew.


With all this said…

After being consumed with the realities of my Black history. I AM DEVASTATED!

As I laid in bed night after night soaking it all in my mind filled with confusion and so many questions. Why and what is it about having black skin that made White people actively work to cause despair and create systems that purposely left Blacks poor, turned to criminals, and kept uneducated? Why as humans did, they want to see other humans fail? Did they enjoy watching the destruction of the Black population? Why did they not consider us human? How am I different, my inner making is exactly the same? The 4 chambers of my heart are the same as yours. What is the real threat of a successful Black population?

As I look around, seeing how all of these heart wrenching systems are still affecting us today in 2020 I can only have one response.


I forgive!


Be kind and have courage to stand against the grain to be set apart in the midst.

We know that the natural state of man is far what our world would have us believe, the natural states of man from the Lord perspective says, And GOD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. Genesis 6:5

He say again after the flood, after he’s taken the initiative to destroy it all because it’s only continually evil,  I will not again curse the ground any more for man’s sake; for the imagination of man’s heart is evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done. Genesis 8:21

In Mark 7 He says, For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man.

And again in 1 Corinthians He wraps it all up in saying, But the natural man receives not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.


Why did all this happen?

It’s because the hearts of men are continually evil! The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately sick who can understand it. Jeremiah 17:9 So all of the questions that filled my head how could I understand it, the intentions of men are desperately wicked, and its not just white people, that’s just the thing, it’s all men.

So again, I chose to be kind and have courage, and stand against the grain to be set apart in the midst of all this chaos.

I refuse to allow hate and suffering to enter my life because I am a free woman. Not in the sense of not a physical slave, no one’s a physical slave anymore, I’m not but I am free from ANY and ALL things that threaten my peace.

Jesus saved me from myself AND everything else that would come to threaten me. Giving in to the anger, pain, and hate that my Black history can create will kill my joy. I won’t allow it. And I won’t let my many children grow up with hate either.

My Black history will not plague my life. My mindset won’t allow me to be consumed by hate. Pain never justifies destruction and my behavior isn’t determined by the behavior and actions of others!

Truth be told, generational wealth isn’t our real legacy. Jesus is. Are you setting your legacy on sand or THE ROCK?

Our boys will not have the “what it’s like to be a Black man in America” conversation. Rather we will continue to have the conversation that they are as capable as any of their white peers, they can accomplish anything their white peers can, respect and humility gets you farther than pride and dishonor on any day and we’ll continue to build strong character paired with productive conflict management skills.

No person on earth will convince my Black family we are less than, oppressed or held back because of white supremacy. We have more freedom than we know what to do with. No matter what our forefathers did.

Real justice comes at the feet of the Lord Jesus in final judgement.

Those who have actively participated in any and all racism will answer for it. It won’t but go unpunished.

Those who refuse to let go of the hatred and vengeance will not go unpunished.

They are two sides of the same suffering coin.

The history is real the pain is real however, I’m not a betting woman but I’d be willing to guess this generation has no idea about the history and the only thing being passed on is the feelings not the information. This is a serious problem.

I will never expect White people today to feel guilty for what our forefathers have created.

I don’t care that millions of White people benefited and continue to benefit from these crooked systems. It’s not the majority’s fault.

I do not want White people to feel pain because I and my ancestors have felt pain. I’m not interested in revenge of any kind.

I do not want to return hurt for hurt.


What I DO want to see from White people …

  • I want White people to educate their children on real Black history that goes further than Martin Luther King Jr. I have a dream.
  • Including White parents raising biracial children. Just being Black isn’t enough. They are experiencing your privilege to a degree.
  • I want White people to educate their children that treating people of every color with humility and respect is invaluable and required.
  • I want White people to SEE my color and love me anyway.
  • I want White people to stop being unhelpful by dwelling in or promoting pain and oppression. Sayings things like using big words around black people is racist.
  • Keep standing up and calling out what’s wrong with the situations we see in life.
  • I want White people to stop pandering and stop the white guilt. If you’re actually racist, CHANGE!
  • I want White people to educate their selves and understand that the Black population aren’t poor uneducated criminals by their own accord.
  • I want White people to educate and remember this country was built on the labor of strong Black men and the womb of the black woman made more slaves.
  • I want White people to remember that Blacks weren’t smart because they were refused the right to even learn how to read, not because they weren’t capable of greatness. WE ARE!


What I don’t want to see from Black people…

  • Don’t just forget.
  • Don’t just get over it.
  • Don’t stay ignorant to the depth of your history.
  • Don’t seek revenge.
  • Don’t ignore those whom are on your side.
  • Don’t accept the narrative that you are oppressed.


What I DO want to see from Black people…

  • I want Black people to educate their children on Black history broader than slavery.
  • I want Black people to stop playing into roles portraying Black culture as pimps, hoes, drugs, and violence.
  • I want Black people in power to stop just dumping money and also help bring a new mindset of success.
  • I want Black people to stop promoting white guilt. Unless they made the systems, they have nothing to feel guilty about.
  • I want Black people not to let it go but to use it as fuel to be great despite our deficit. And help your friends and family be great too.
  • I want Black people to forgive and find healing for their hurting hearts.
  • I want Black people to stop ignoring the issues we CAN fix, come together and create a plan to change our laws.
  • I want Black people to connect with me and let’s talk about what we want and how to get it through our law system.
  • I want Black people to recognize we may be 400 years behind but this world is not permanent. Healing, humility and honoring the Lord Jesus puts you FIRST no matter where you are in life.
  • I want Black White Red Yellow and Brown people to hold hands and change what we can change together.
  • Recognize all the White people who are on your side and stop demanding guilt and fighting them. The tables have turned there are more standing with you than against you today. 2020 is not 1820



I want to apologize to me Black counterparts for being ignorant to our history. Please forgive me for that.

I want to apologize to my White counterparts for the atmosphere that was created that you are also forced to live in too. I know it’s hard.


Mindset matters. This is my heart. I want to keep talking after the emotions of these tragic events have worn off.

We need to stop being offended, if Black people won’t allow White to say the wrong thing, how will they know what we need this vicious cycle of offense needs to stop. Ignorance isn’t bad, staying ignorant is. And it’s important we come to an understanding that we are all marching toward the same cause.

Jesus comes to heal the broken in heart and bind up their wounds. I have been a firsthand experiencer to this. The real justice is at the feet of Jesus, in Psalm 43 its written, Vindicate me, O God, and plead my case against an ungodly nation; O deliver me from the deceitful and unjust man!

It is by grace and through faith and this is not of ourselves. It is the gift of God not by works so that no one can boast He saves us not because of righteous things we have done but because of his mercy, he saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit.

That is where the true power comes from, that is where the healing comes from, the compassion comes from, the understanding and the wisdom, and the true justice comes from. We need to step out of the racial divide and hold hands.



I can tell you right now that I have seen so many platforms, Couponing, in the blogging world, in businesses, the amount of white people who want to help is overwhelming, the amount of white people standing side by side with black individual trying to help is amazing. And I’ve seen too much of the Black population choose hate and violence over communication.

So, these are some of my thoughts, and I’m just gonna leave it at that. I’ll post some links to some sources of some things I found if anybody wants to educate themselves. And I hope to be able to talk about it moving forward. Okay bye, bye.


Sources and Information:

Black Wall Street-


Red Lining-




Freedmen’s Bill-


Special Field Orders No.15-


Fourteenth Amendment-

Come find me on Facebook, that's where I hang out when I'm not writing. Talk soon!

Words are always more fun when you hold that vowel for an extra beat. Am I right? Anyhoo, thanks for stopping by. I'm committed to helping women crush the belief that being loved is possible for everyone but herself while learning to cultivate life with courage!!



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